Difference between revisions of "The Scurvy Crew of The Hell-born Strumpet"
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Revision as of 22:44, 21 September 2006
The Scurvy Crew of The Hell-born Strumpet|-style="background-color: #ffffff; text-align: center;" | |-style="background-color: #c3ddc3; text-align: center;" | In-game page | |||
Leadership: | Captain Tyler Whitney | ||||
Members: | There be the Captain, the First Mate, the Sailing Master, the Master's Mate, the Gunner, the Gunner's Mate, the Ship's Surgeon, the Surgeon's Mate, a Rum Runner, the Cabin Boy, the Ship's Carpenter, the Boatswain, the Cartographer the Able-bodied Seamen, and A Monkey. | ||||
Goals: | The pursuit of booty and/or rum. YARRR!!! | ||||
Recruitment policy: | ARRR!! All crew positions be determined by first-come first-serve or no rules cage death match. Ye must be a pirate or pirate sympathizer. If ye wish to name your own rank ye have liberty to add it to the ship's manifest. | ||||
Contact: | E-mail aehrig@hamilton.edu to be added to the manifest. |
New Tortuga
The Wiksik Raid was hard fighting, no denying that. Those members of the crew who braved the jungle, ill-educated anti-pirate outsiders, native beasts, and savage natives, found themselves several days travel away from their home shaman. The glory and rum won by our cutlasses was that much sweeter with the struggle.
(Derbymen, unaligned Pirates, and members of The Scurvy Crew battle through the island's natives to assault the shaman of Wiksik.)
Many Pirates and Outsiders died in the Wicksick raid. The Captain himself greeted his pirate brethren in the afterlife. It was in this shadow realm that the Captain witnessed the Giant Bottle of Rum.
"Behold your better," said the Bottle of Rum, "And Despair..."
And the Captain of The Scurvy Crew beheld the Giant Bottle of Rum. "Truly I both love and fear you O' Giant Bottle of Rum, but what of my Pirate brothers and sisters? We have been scattered across the island" he said. "We are hunted for our heads by rumless savages. Where can we go to celebrate our bloody plunder and drain the island of rum?"
And yay the Giant Bottle of Rum looked upon the Scurvy Crew in their toils in Wiksik and said, "Know that I have created an island for ye who hunger, and thirst for drunkeness, and it is not the island you stand on. It is the island west of Shartak, and as ye pirates (the beloved children of the Giant Bottle of Rum) love inebriation, so shall you find rum on this island. And it shall be named "New Tortuga".
And the Captain understood The Giant Bottle of Rum, and knew its purpose for the Scurvy Crew. All Crewmembers be hereby ordered to flood the large, horizontal island west of the greater island of Shartak. This island, south of the Strumpet's wreck and west of the Native village of Dalpok, shall be known as "New Tortuga". New Tortuga shall henceforth be known as a private gaming preserve for outsiders in general, but pirates especially, and especially The Scurvy Crew of the Hell-born Strumpet.
The Scurvy Crew's claim on New Tortuga and mediation with prior residents will be ongoing, but there be no reason to choose a life of hermitage while there's plenty of blood and rum to be found on mainland Shartak.
Bloody Dalpok!
It was in the midst of a late afternoon apertif of 3 liters of Derby Rum that a sharpening stone was dropped in the Captain's lap by a particularly ugly monkey.
"Goddamit Monkey!" the Captain said. "That's the fifth time ye interrupted my pouring!"
The Captain then proceeded to waste three days of his life hunting the particularly ugly monkey through jungle, ruins, and shipwreck. He finally cornered it in the Strumpet's Crow's Nest (that sounds a bit racy doesn't it? Nevermind!). After the long pursuit, and being a bit peckish, the Captain ate the monkey.
Sources believe this to be the monkey in its natural habitat, and before the Captain ate it.
It was only when he got to the tail that he noticed a missive tied to it with a green ribbon. Picking his teeth with a monkey rib the Captain sat down to read the message with an after-supper pint of rum. It read:
"Ahoy Captain! My Gang of pirates has planned a raid on dalpok. We have a large deal of pirates marching on Dalpok next week,I would like to invite any of your crew members who might be around to partake in the pillage.--Michael edwards 00:17, 31 August 2006 (UTC)"
"Four Cannon's A-Blazing!" exclaimed the Captain with what he believed to be a pirate expression (it was not, in fact no pirate until him had ever said those words). "There are other pirates on the island besides my beloved Scurvy Crew?" The Captain then sat down and spent the rest of the day drinking and thinking about the implications of this discovery.
The Captain awoke the next morning to hear a ghost whispering in his ear. Shooting up ramrod straight the Captain climbed up Crow's Nest once more, and pulled from his pocket a whistle made of Native bones. Taking a deep breath the Captain then blew on the whistle, but no sound was heard. In fact, the dozens of pirates around the Strumpet's wreck (who the Captain had been too drunk or insane to notice until a day ago) were completely oblivious to the tiny figure at the top of the Crow's Nest, playing a whistle with all his formidable might. But across Shartak, in jungles and mountains, villages and grasslands, buried in swamps and floating in water, specially trained sets of ears heard a faint ringing.
"My Beloved Scruvy Crew of the Hell-Born Strumpet!" bellowed Captain Tyler Whitney from the Crow's Nest, "Blood's being spilled in a Native Village and we're not the cause of it! All crewmembers be ordered to join our pirate brothers in flooding the dirt paths of Dalpok with blood! BYOB!"
The Royal Expedition
Mr Dan here. I cannot stop ye or order ye to do anything, but for Christ Sake, PLEASE DON'T ATTACK ANY ROYAL EXPEDITION MEMBERS!!! I've spent a fair while negotiating with them not to attack us. We do not need a war. For more details, look at their talk page. Captain Dan
Well, I don't know why, but I just got killed by mister Jones Dye, a member of the Royal Expedition --Xintlaer 17:23, 25 August 2006 (UTC)
Ah hell with it. I can't negotiate. Kill em if you want. I wish you would have put a word in this Captain. Captain Dan
that bastard jones dye just killed me too! he's on new tortuga! someone kill him--Badhammer 14:51, 3 September 2006 (UTC)
Parley has been resumed with York and the Royal Expedition. If no appropriate reply is sent ye have liberty to pursue your vengance without fear of censure from your crew.
Current goals be:
- Crew the ship: The Hell-born Strumpet (the bonniest ship in whatever ocean the island's in)
- Terrorize the locals
- Pursue the elusive three-headed monkey
- Rum
- Keelhauling
- Wenches
- Plunder
- Grog
The Code of The Scurvy Crew
Any Pirates with the fortitude of spirit, or plenty of the hard spirits with which to fortify themselves may join, er, yargh...
- Every man shall obey civil Command; the Captain shall have one full share and a half in all Prizes; the Master, Carpenter, Surgeon, Boatswain and Gunner shall have one Share and quarter.
- If any man shall offer to run away, or keep any Secret from the Company, he shall be marroon'd with one Bottle of Powder, one Bottle of Water, one small Arm and shot.
- If any Many shall steel any Thing in the Company, or game, to the Value of a Piece of Eight, he shall be marroon'd or shot.
- If at any Time we should meet another Marrooner (that is Pyrate) that Man that shall sign his Articles without the Consent of our Company, shall suffer such Punishment as the Captain and Company shall think fit.
- That Man that shall strike another whilst these Articles are in force, shall receive Mose's Law (that is 40 stripes lacking one) on the bare Back.
- That Man that shall snap his Arms, or smoak Tobacco in the Hold, without a cap to his Pipe, or carry a Candle lighted without a Lanthorn, shall suffer the same Punishment as in the former Article.
- That Man that shall not keep his Arms clean, fit for an Engagement, or neglect his Business, shall be cut off from his Share, and suffer such other Punishment as the Captain and the Company shall think fit.
- If any Man shall lose a Joint in time of an Engagement he shall have 400 pieces of Eight; if a limb 800.
- If at any time you meet with a prudent Woman, that Man that offers to meddle with her, without her Consent, shall suffer present Death.
The Scurvy Crew is Legion
YAHRR! We be the first clan on the island to break 40 members!! The Captain decrees an extra pint of grog to all members in celebration.
Now accepting crew for the positions of:
- The Captain: Tyler Whitney
Welcome aboard Mr. Cutthroat and Mr. Xenor!!
The Captain's offer of Parley to the Order of Patriots was soundly denied. The Scurvy Crew is now free to hunt them and the Pirate Hunters wherever they are found. Special care must be taken that innocent outsiders are not also slain so all crewmembers are advised to check their prey's profile before they strike.
- First Mate: Johnny Bollocks Last one to get drunk and laid will feel the lick o' the cat!
- Sailing Master: Rob CathI'm trying to start a dialoge with the outsiders. Somehow they keep falling over saying "why did you stab me??" it's like they don't know how to talk to a pirate??
- Master's Mate: Teach
- Ship's Surgeon/Public Relations: Captain Dan Me blades are sharp and I be bored. For the Crew!!!
- Surgeon's Mate: Rob Da Blades
- Boatswain: Xintlaer They shall feel my blade deep between their ribs...
- Gunner: Wifey Yargh!
- Gunner's Mate: Wolverine This bein' before the whole Weapon X thing o' course.
- Cartographer: Baron Von Roeboat
- Quartermaster:
- Carpenter: Dian Cecht
- Carpenter's Mate:
- Steward:
- Cook: Pieman
- Sailing Instructer: Captain Barbossa
- Billiard-marker: Tycho "Yarr" Everett
- Cabin Boy:born to kill
- Wenches: Irene
- Rum Runners: Opium Joe
- Ship's Monkey: Dr Capitalism(The monkey was attacked by natives... time to go pillage a village.)
- Monkey's Mate:
- Our preserved Native head: Shrubar, shaman of Dalpok
- and Able Bodied Seamen:
- Crimson Jake
- Sigfrid Süßermann Avast!
- Anne Bonny
- Axelius
- Jim Davey Jones
- badhammer
- Karrak the Drunk
- Xenor
- Cutthroat
- Jimbo Cooke
- Marines(Outsider Soldiers):
- Drunk, One-Eyed, No-Thumbed Swordsmith Who's Responsible for Every Poorly made Cutlass on the Island:
- Gold Biter & Rum Tester Arr Matee
Pirates be expert cartographers
There has been talk of pirates scouring the mountain for buried treasure, and the Captain has seen Mr. Wifey in one of the tunnels. To help with navigation here be the first map of paths under the mountain yet produced.
Thanks go to Dr J for his spelunking.
The Case of Mr. Badhammer
...has been moved to the discussion page in lieu of a dedicated history page to come later (once there's enough history to justify its existence). Any who wish to read about the first application of nautical justice in the island's history may find it there.
OI!!! cap'n can I get m' job back as Quartermaster? i took m' punishment an' i rallied the lot o' th' crew into the pillagin' dogs o' war we be. an my cutlass be loyal t' yer orders. i am more scurvy of a dog than jus' an able bodied sea man, i be a master o' quarters an such. yarrr. i be seein ye' at new toruga mate.--Badhammer 04:45, 30 August 2006 (UTC)
Bring the Crew 5 ears of native pirate-killers and you can resume your former duties. Ears in this case being links to their profiles demonstrating they kill pirates and the standard timestamps proving you killed them. There'll be plenty of opportunities for this in Dalpok or anywhere else you wish to go.-The Captain
As the man said:
"The average man will bristle if you say his father was dishonest, but he will brag a little if he discovers that his great-grandfather was a pirate."
Native Guide
The Crew of the Hell-born Strumpet are looking for a native guide not only to translate and inform the crew of any hidden island booty, but also to be mocked and paid in small pox.
Total Natives Killed in the First Dalpok Raid:
- 46 (This be only the official count given by those who posted their exploits here. Several crewmembers may have cut swaths through the Dalpokers, yet abstained from announcing themselves because they did not know they could, or abstained from boasting for other, more mysterious reasons. Many, many more natives tasted cold steel, yet escaped death due to the crew's fatigue or their cutlasses' notoriously shoddy workmanship.)
Summation of Wiksik Raid
Will be here once all parties are accounted for.
Second Dalpok Raid
Tyler Whitney:
Johny Bollocks:
Rob Cath:
Teach:
Captain Dan: 6 - This is what we pirates should be doing!
Rob Da Blade: 1
Xintlaer: 6 - Guess I'm not that bad... next one on the list...
Wifey:
Wolverine:
Baron Von Roeboat:
badhammer:
Pieman:
Tycho "Yarr" Everett:
Born to Kill:
Dr Capitalism:
Crimson Jake:
Sigfrid:
Anne Bonny:
Axelius:
OpiumJoe: 5 natives dead
Irene:
Karrak the Drunk: