The Scurvy Crew of The Hell-born Strumpet
| The Scurvy Crew of The Hell-born Strumpet|-style="background-color: #ffffff; text-align: center;" | 
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| Leadership: | Captain Tyler Whitney | ||
| Members: | There be the Captain, the First Mate, the Sailing Master, the Master's Mate, the Gunner, the Ship's Surgeon, the Boatswain, the Cartographer the Able-bodied Seamen, and A Monkey. | ||
| Goals: | The pursuit of booty and/or rum. YARRR!!! | ||
| Recruitment policy: | ARRR!! All crew positions be determined by first-come first-serve or no rules cage death match. Ye must be a pirate or pirate sympathizer. If ye wish to name your own rank ye have liberty to add it to the ship's manifest. | ||
| Contact: | E-mail aehrig@hamilton.edu to be added to the manifest. | ||
Contents
TODAY'S THE DAY!!!
In keeping with Captain Whitney's promise to keep the crew crotch-deep in booty, rum, and native women the Scurvy Crew has commenced it's first organized raid. The savage, pagan monkey-worshipers and dart-spitters of the island invaded our wreck, slew our hostage Shaman, and picked the weakest of the crew off while their senses were dulled by rum and female companionship. All crew members are to make a screaming, burning, cursing run into Dalpok where we will drink, fight, and pillage until each of us is dead. If the pagan gods of the island love the offerings of blood and gold we spill within the village we will be returned to our pretty lass, The Hell-Born Strumpet WHERE THE FIRST ROUND WILL BE ON THE CAPTAIN!!! All who inflict the Scurvy Crew's bloody vengeance on the village of Dalpok (the source of many of our woes since the Strumpet was wrecked) will recieve from the captain their share of the purchase of their blood to enjoy their well-earned ration of grog!!! YAAAAAHHHHRRRRGGHH!!!!!!!
Current goals be:
- Crew the ship: The Hell-born Strumpet (the bonniest ship in whatever ocean the island's in)
- Terrorize the locals
- Pursue the elusive three-headed monkey
- Rum
- Keelhauling
- Wenches
- Plunder
- Grog
The Code of The Scurvy Crew
Any Pirates with the fortitude of spirit, or plenty of the hard spirits with which to fortify themselves may join, er, yargh...
Now accepting crew for the positions of:
- The Captain: Tyler Whitney
The Scurvy Crew be now the dominant clan on the island. The Captain gives his regards to the entire crew. Yet, he spies that some members on the wiki have not listed the crew in their profile, and others are similarly not listed on the wiki. Many pirates, being illiterate violent, donkey punching drunks, don't know yet how to add their names to the wiki manifest. The Captain advises them to make their names and profiles known to other crewmembers who will mark them on the manifest.
The Captain gives his congratulations to the Ship's Surgeon for his (no doubt meticulously delicately executed) savage bloody murder of the Native Warchanter. The Captain gave him another thrashing with the cutlass, but to avoid similar repeat attacks the crew is advised to avoid the Natives lingering at the Shaman and spread out to make sure every native in Dalpok tastes cold steel by the end of the raid.
- First Mate: Johnny Bollocks Last one to get drunk and laid will feel the lick o' the cat!
- Sailing Master: Rob Cath Eye, it's good fun raiding the natives. Got 5 kills so far. Going back for the shaman. Who's with me eh???
- Master's Mate: Teach
- Ship's Surgeon: Captain Dan I've been to Dalpok and been killed. I'LL CASTRATE THE 1ST NATIVE I SEE!!!!
- Surgeon's Mate: Rob Da Blades
- Boatswain: Xintlaer (Got my leadership skill Capt'n... awaiting orders...)
- Gunner: Wifey Yargh!
- Gunner's Mate: Wolverine This bein' before the whole Weapon X thing o' course.
- Cartographer: Baron Von Roeboat
- Quartermaster: badhammer
- Carpenter: Dian Cecht
- Carpenter's Mate:
- Steward:
- Cook: Pieman
- Billiard-marker: Tycho "Yarr" Everett
- Cabin Boy:born to kill
- Wenches:
- Rum Runners: Opium Joe
- Ship's Monkey: Dr Capitalism(The monkey was attacked by natives... time to go pillage a village.)
- Monkey's Mate:
- Our preserved Native head: The Chief
- Our second preserved Native head: Shrubar, shaman of Dalpok
- and Able Bodied Seamen:
Pirates be expert cartographers
There has been talk of pirates scouring the mountain for buried treasure, and the Captain has seen Mr. Wifey in one of the tunnels. To help with navigation here be the first map of paths under the mountain yet produced.
Thanks go to Dr J for his spelunking.
As the man said:
"The average man will bristle if you say his father was dishonest, but he will brag a little if he discovers that his great-grandfather was a pirate."
Native Guide
The Crew of the Hell-born Strumpet are looking for a native guide not only to translate and inform the crew of any hidden island booty, but also to be mocked and paid in small pox.
Natives Killed List
Just set this up so we could keep track of how many natives we get on THIS trip to Dalpok. Put your count next to your name. Captain Dan/Surgeon
Tyler Whitney: Including this morning the new total is 4... In answer to your question Ship's Surgeon: Nothing. Hitting the same guy over and over (although very funny if done often enough) doesn't quite intimidate the locals as much as indiscriminate carnage.
Johny Bollocks:
Rob Cath:
Teach:
Captain Dan: 6 (I have been killed 7 times now. Is that a new record? Currently running back down at full speed to get killing again!!!)
Rob Da Blade:
Xintlaer: That'll be 8 mateys... and dead...
Wifey:
Wolverine: 4 (Tis funny how we run so hard into battle after dying)
Baron Von Roeboat:
badhammer:
Pieman:
Tycho "Yarr" Everett:
Born to Kill:
Dr Capitalism:
Crimson Jake:
Sigfrid:
Anne Bonny:
Axelius:
OpiumJoe: 3
