The Scurvy Crew of The Hell-born Strumpet
| The Scurvy Crew of The Hell-born Strumpet | |
| Leadership: | Captain Tyler Whitney |
| Members: | There be the Captain, the First Mate, the Sailing Master, the Master's Mate, the Gunner, the Ship's Surgeon, the Boatswain, Mr. Jake the Able-bodied Seaman, and A Monkey. |
| Goals: | The pursuit of booty and/or rum. YARRR!!! |
| Recruitment policy: | ARRR!! All crew positions be determined by first-come first-serve or no rules cage death match. Ye must be a pirate or pirate sympathizer. E-mail aehrig@hamilton.edu to be added to the manifest. |
| Contact: | If ye wish to name your own rank ye have liberty to add it to the ship's manifest or e-mail. |
Contents
Avast me hearties!!!
Here be a clan for all pirates who believe in the pursuit of booty, rum, and native women. If ye be up to the task add yer name to the page and Captain Tyler Whitney will have ye crotch deep in grog and wenches before ye can say YARGH!!!
Current goals be:
Crew the ship: The Hell-born Strumpet (the bonniest ship in whatever ocean the island's in)
- Crew the ship
- Terrorize the locals
- Pursue the elusive three-headed monkey
- Rum
- Keelhauling
- Wenches
- Plunder
- Grog
The Code of The Scurvy Crew
Any Pirates with the fortitude of spirit, or plenty of the hard spirits with which to fortify themselves may join, er, yargh...
Now accepting crew for the positions of:
- The Captain: Tyler Whitney The Captain declares vendetta on the village of Dalpok for repeated raids on the Strumpet's shaman. THREE PIECES OF EIGHT AND A SHINY NEW DONKEY BE AWARDED FOR EVERY DALPOKER HIDE YE RETURN TO THE STRUMPET!!!
- First Mate: Johnny Bollocks Last one to get drunk and laid will feel the lick o' the cat!
- Sailing Master: Rob Cath
- Master's Mate: Teach
- Ship's Surgeon: Captain Dan (Thanks be with you all for welcoming me abord, ARGH! My Philosaphy: To Hell with Asperin, RUM, RUM AND MORE RUM!!!)
- Boatswain: Xintlaer (NOW ALL HANDS ON DECK, AND POLISH THEM CANNONS!!!.. oh, and bring meh a bottle o' rum... Aye, we see that the Crew is growing... good.. OFF TO WORK YA LAZY LANDLUBBERS)
- Gunner: Wifey has a number of shiny new donkeys.
- Gunner's Mate:
- Quartermaster:
- Carpenter:
- Carpenter's Mate:
- Steward:
- Cook:
- Cabin Boy:
- Wenches:
- Rum Runners:
- Ship's Monkey: Dr Capitalism(Yoho and such, me hearties. The ship's monkey has gone off to get lost in the mountains, but I be... lost. I think I need me a mate as soon as can be, so's I can get lost more efficiently.)
- Monkey's Mate:
- Our preserved Native head: The Chief
- Our second preserved Native head: Shrubar, shaman of Dalpok
- and Able Bodied Seamen:Crimson Jake
Pirates be expert cartographers
There has been talk of pirates scouring the mountain for buried treasure, and the Captain has seen Mr. Wifey in one of the tunnels. To help with navigation here be the first map of paths under the mountain yet produced.
As the man said:
"The average man will bristle if you say his father was dishonest, but he will brag a little if he discovers that his great-grandfather was a pirate."
Native Guide
The Crew of the Hell-born Strumpet are looking for a native guide not only to translate and inform the crew of any hidden island booty, but also to be mocked and paid in small pox.
