Derby Evening Press/Issue 02

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The Derby Continues

An Editorial

The Derby Derby cast a two day reign of terror of the the peaceful town, but in the last two weeks of the conflict, after the Eastern Federation's patrols had begun, the number of heads being taken in the city dropped drastically.

This drop is a direct result of the good planning of Jack Molay and other Eastern Federation members, who decided to discard the use of Durham's 'Critical Mass' defense against thier headhunters, and opted to use patrols and agressive response to any headhunters they discovered. Estimated short-term effects of the Derby Derby include an increased awareness of the dangers of the island and an increase in townsfolk turning to law enforcement or healing. In the last week, half a dozen people have joined in discussions about repeling the headhunters, some of them also joining the Eastern Federation's clans.

This increase in Derbian power reflects the recent cultural development in the town, as more great projects and buildings are opened, more people wish to protect them from aggressors. The expected long-term results of the Derby Derby vary from the good and the bad. Alliances and friendships have been brought into the limelight. The Derbian Defenders have been, perhaps not intentionally, ignored by thier comrades on the island. Very few non-EF or Derbian fighters are participating in the defence; only a handful of outside help has come to the Federation's aid. But ultimately, the Derbians will likely benefit from the Derby. The defenders of the town are now stronger and better equipped for another attack. They have been seen to withstand a stong foe with only the tools at thier disposal, whereas Durham failed to be defended well, even with a multitude of outside help.

And we must all remember that the headhunters will be gone in one week, and Derby will be left standing stronger than before.

The Derby Derby: A View from all Fronts

Because there are so many sides to the Derby Derby, the editorial staff has conducted short interviews with a Derby Privateer, a Derby Hospitaller, an unaligned Derbian, and a Wicksick Headhunter. The Derby Evening Press would like to thank Entropy for her cooperation. Naturally, we didn't meet her face to face. We like our heads where they are.

Rob Zombie

  • Please identify yourself for the benefit of our readers.

Rob Zombie, founder and captain of the 1st Derby Privateers.

  • Your clan is a major player in Derby's defense against the Headhunt. How do you feel about progress thus far in protecting Derby?

I think the patrols we set up have been a great sucsess. So far I have only seen one person beheaded in the city since this began. And the plan to kill the Shaman assisting the Headhunters was pure genius, that realy helped us out.

  • In your opinion, what effects are likely to arise from the Derby Derby?

Awareness. More Derbians have become aware of the threats that lurk on the island, and have decided to join the Eastern Federation. The Derby Derby will end, and we will all be better for it, wiser, stronger and better prepared for the next time.

Jack Molay

  • Please identify yourself for the benefit of our readers.

I'm Consul Jack Molay, a long-term member of the Derby Hospitallers and founding member of the Eastern Federation. I like Italian food and long walks on the beach.

  • Your clan is a major player in Derby's defense against the Headhunt, and (more importantly), you are generally credited as the architect of Derby's defense strategy. How do you feel about progress thus far in protecting Derby?

Thus far, I'm quite pleased with the defense system. Although the headhunters made some succesful initial forays into the town, we've caught up with them and have mostly prevented them from making further raids. Most of the kills at the moment seem to be occuring outside town, and I'm currently considering ways to increase our coverage to give additional protection to our people out in the jungles.

At first, I was a little worried that we might not have enough people to cover the town effectively. After the debacle of the Durham Defense Unit, a lot of people weren't willing to commit to a similar project, and the pointless fighting in York deprived us of several potential allies as well. But thanks to the selfless dedication of the people of Derby, our numbers have swelled and I believe we now have one of the largest coordinated defense forces on the island.

  • In your opinion, what effects are likely to arise from the Derby Derby?

I suspect the effects will be mostly positive for Derby. We've now forged the Federation into a slick, organised defense force capable of withstanding any future threats and keeping the peace within Derby as well. The Hospitallers have several projects in the pipeline to complement this, and I think we can all look forwards to a safe and militarised Derby.

Mark D. Stroyer

  • Please identify yourself for the benefit of our readers.

I am SGT Mark D. Stroyer (Ret.). I'm a mid-level Derbian resident, with no membership to any clan.

  • You are not a member of either of the clans of the Eastern Federation. Therefore, you are more likely to be unbiased. How do you feel about the progress of Derby's defense thus far?

I think it has been inefficient and not particularly effective, due largely to the lack of members available to respond. Thus, the time that passes between a native spotting and reaction is significant enough to allow the native to slip away undetected.

  • In your opinion, what effects are likely to arise from the Derby Derby?

Frankly, not much. Although I would like to see a contest similar to the headhunt on one of the native villages.


  • Please identify yourself for the benefit of our readers.

My name is Entropy and I come from the native village of Dalpok.

  • What prompted you to become a Wicksick Headhunter?\

The constant attacks by pirates on my village. After seeing many of my fellow villagers killed, when I saw a pirate in town one time in my early years, I went in a frenzy and beat him down. My last attack on him was to his neck. His head came off and I decided to keep it as a trophy to show my fighting skills to my fellow villagers.

  • Can you explain the reasoning behind the "Derby Derby"? We Derbians are curious as to why our heads keep separating themselves from our necks.

The rituals of the WickSick headhunters are a closely guarded secret so I can not reveal all. The Shamans say the Gods will provide the headhunter who collects the most heads for the outsider village of Derby shall be granted a heavy sword from the Gods themselves. That is all I am allowed to say.

  • How do you and the Wicksick Headhunters feel the Derby Derby is progressing?

I feel things are going quite well for us. I personally have taken 8 heads for the Derby Derby and have reached 100 heads taken in total. at think time I think we are close to 40 heads taken so far. Fun is being had by all! Even repeat Derby customers such as lardman are having fun with it, now that they know it isn't anything personal other then them being from Derby.

  • In your opinion, what effects are likely to arise from the Derby Derby?

Short term, it is giving the headhunters a chance to work together and have fun doing it. Long term, much the same, as I am sure we will be organizing more hunts in the future. The effect on Derby is rather amusing to see the outsiders scatter like bugs from a flame when they see one of us coming.

BREAKING NEWS:Derby-York Alliance Ends

Regrettably, the last alliance linking York to Derby has come to an end. The Derby Hospitallers have reportedly withdrawn from their alliance with the Colonial Police. The 1st Derby Privateers, once allied with the Colonial Police, ended their alliance with the CP some time ago. More will be reported as the situation develops.