The Shartak Wiki - User contributions [en]

User talk:Nankilstlas

2006-10-22T02:18:40Z

Josef:

Uh. Sorry to bother ye, but you saw me on Shartak and said something to me... translation guide wasn't very helpful.

nankilstlas says “nik sikfal hokrak...gak SIK tam dalhok” (2006-10-21 16:07)

So uh... can you translate for me? Many thanks! [[User:Josef|Josef]] 02:18, 22 October 2006 (UTC)

Talk:Language

2006-10-22T02:13:48Z

Josef:

As observed by Tack's translation of GPS unit (gak uckick)/GPS units (gak ucktam) and poison dart (posik dalrak)/poison darts (poksik daltam), plurals are treated differently. No verification if this "-tam" suffix is common in more plurals. It is clearly not used for some berries (sikmog bakrakicksik) --[[User:Lint|Lint]] 01:26, 12 May 2006 (BST)

Messages on the Southern Islet:
*'''Basic Language:''' ''Wiklalocke to the Sikartamkam Eckpoknt Sikcooary.''
*'''Advanced Language:''' ''Wiklalocke to the Sikartamk Eckpoknt Sikcooary.''
*'''Basic Language:''' ''Daloresikdal by Dalve C, May '06.''
*'''Advanced Language:''' ''Daloresikd by Dalve C, May '06.'' --[[User:Lint|Lint]] 00:39, 13 May 2006 (BST)

Eh. Can anyone translate this for me? "nik sikfal hokrak...gak SIK tam dalhok" (Yes I'm asking for help.) [[User:Josef|Josef]] 02:13, 22 October 2006 (UTC)

Talk:Language

2006-10-22T02:12:47Z

Josef:

Talk:Colonial police

2006-10-18T01:39:42Z

Josef: /* Your wanted lists... */

== General Discussion ==

You guys seem like a nice, civilised group of people. If you'd be interested in opening relations with the Royal Expedition, contact us via our forum: http://s9.invisionfree.com/Royal_Expedition/index.php? --Less Than Lethal

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "Hi Yeah, signed up on your forums. We're definitely interested. Look forward to doing buisiness with you."'''

Hey, any chance you can put up a section on this wiki to report crimes? I posted on the PK thread and nothing yet. I was hoping you guys could help. He is Stoertebecker [ http://www.shartak.com/profile.cgi?id=1553 ] and i'd like to see him dead. He killed me, then attacked me the very same day after I resurrected (and that, my friend, is not very sportsmanlike, PKer or not). I also found him in the far westerly area of York, where there are five huts bunched together. Can you make an 'arrest'? Jack W Spalding.

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "Yeah, we've heard of him Jack. In fact, he killed one of our officers. We're doing all we can to stop him. Oh, and if you want to add a criminal to the list, just put them under "--Criminals--" at the bottom of this page and they'll be added A.S.A.P."

::'''Arwedda - "We would, of course, like some proof in the way of a screenshot of the murder. We've had trouble with people not being identified correctly."

I was in the York medical hut on May 14, and in the recent actions log it displayed that Lord Paul Reefer killed czech1. I'm sure your probably already aware of this, but I'd like to help your cause in anyway I can. Cheers --[[User:Gandhi|Gandhi]] 03:32, 15 May 2006 (BST)

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "Yeah, we know. Thanks anyway Gandhi, any information you can give us is always a great help."
== Most Wanted ==

Hell yeah, I made a wanted list and wasnt even trying! You guys should totally do a 'ten most wanted' or suchlike. It'd stoke my ego no end :P -- Dave C

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "Watch yourself Dave... Murders in York will NOT be tolerated..."'''

Dont worry, I'm busy deforesting an islet for the hell of it at the moment. You're dave-free for a while ;) -- Dave C

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "Heh, good luck with that. See you round Dave... see you round..."'''

Aw, crap. "Justin Fected" decided to come to Shartak. In UD, he's a fairly infamous PKer. Keep an eye open for an alt he'll likely have, "Justin Time."--[[User:Wifey|Wifey]] 00:21, 9 May 2006 (BST)

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "Thanks Wifey, we'll keep our eyes peeled."'''

==Raktamites==
As a Raktamite, I'm fairly certain when I say... It's just Phutnanog.--[[User:Wifey|Wifey]] 07:27, 11 May 2006 (BST)

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "No matter who they are, if someone kills another player in York, they will be brought to justice."

==Lord Paul Reefer's Group==
(Any information on Lord Paul Reefer or his lackeys would be appreciated. If the information leads to his execution, a reward of gold will be provided.)

==Criminals==
I was killed by [http://www.shartak.com/profile.cgi?id=1828 Mal] completely unprovoked.--[[User:Tom Failur|Tom Failur]] 19:33, 28 May 2006 (BST)

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "Thanks Tom. Mal has just been executed."'''

Hey, you missed some of my murders. I updated your page with the correct number.--[[User:Sora Lamal|Sora Lamal]] 20:55, 24 July 2006 (GST}

I've dealt with eminem1 after he assaulted everyone who was inside the Colonial Police Headquarters-- [[User:Zydd Soral|Zydd Soral]] 23:16 16 August 2006

My peacable pirate [http://www.shartak.com//profile.cgi?id=1604 Patch] just got attacked by Che a little ways outside York. Is this the welcome York reserves for an honary member of the [[Durham Pistoleers]]? -- [[User:Gitboy|Less Than Lethal]] 00:08, 20 August 2006 (UTC)

==New Recruits==
(If you are interested in joining the CPHQ post your name and profile here)

I know my reputation with you isn't spotless, but I'd like to change my ways and right my wrongs.--[[User:Sora Lamal|Sora Lamal]]

==Great News!==
[http://www.shartak.com/profile.cgi?id=1327 Tom Failur], the 'Butcher of York', known murderer and scallywag, was executed by the [http://wiki.shartak.com/index.php/Order_of_Patriots Order of Patriots] last night. Despite having slain over 20 yorkmen without warning or provocation, Tom was quietly removed from the CP's Most Wanted list, and has in fact been aided by them when attacked by a native nearby. Why was he not apprehended and despatched before these atrocities could happen? Clearly the time is long overdue for right-thinking citizens of York to take matters into their own hands!

I must say I was shocked when I was helped after I had killed so many York citizens. I was also quietly disaapointed to be removed from the wanted list. It does seem like the CP is not able to enforce law and order in York. However death isn't the end. I will return to York to kill again as I am being paid to do it. I'm sure we will meet agin.--[[User:Tom Failur|Tom Failur]] 12:51, 1 June 2006 (BST)

Oh right, so NOW you add him to the wanted list. Don't you think thats a bit late? -- Order of Patriots 11:13, 3 June 2006 (BST)

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "We had our reasons..."'''
::'''[[User:Arwedda|Arwedda]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "The Colonial Police would like to take this opportunity to state that although we asked for evidence of these atrocities, multiple times, none was presented. At the moment we do ''NOT'' unprovokedly attack people without proof, unlike ''some vigilante organisations'' that I do not care to mention. However, with the above admission of guilt coming to light, we have added him to our wanted list. Secondly, we would like to state that ''we do not encourage murder in any capacity'', and the apparent "Helping" of Tom Failur was merely the removal of a different dangerous criminal from the streets of York."'''

==The South Shartak Trading Company==

Hi! Great work you're doing! I was wondering, I have a couple of natives in my company. They would like to do business with the Outsider towns. Could you guys make sure you and your boys at least don't shoot them? They're good people, and they wouldn't be agents of the SSTC if they're proven to be killing without provokation. I also hope you'll persecute anyone that murders my fellow traders, be it pirate, native or outsider. They'll be on the member list of the SSTC wiki page. Again, thanks for the law enforcement! '''Jack W Spalding'''

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "We never attack natives unprovoked. We can only protect them in York. But, if they're heading that way, tell them to stay in the western part of York. That way we can keep our eyes on them."'''

==Mercenaries Guild==
As I have said on the OOP wiki talk, I feel your persecution of the Mercenaries Guild is unfounded. We Mercenaries are simply trying to earn an honest living - and we are honest. We work for anyone, providing the coin is good enough. No coin, no kill/job. We do not kill out of malicious intent, we're trying to survive in a merc-unfriendly world...--[[User:HVLD|HVLD]] 23:41, 7 July 2006 (UTC)

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "We never attack ANYONE unprovoked."

::'''[[User:Arwedda|Arwedda]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "We execute anyone who commits murder, even if they do so for money. In fact, last time I checked, killing someone for money was an even worse crime than killing someone in anger. Of course, we do also want to punish those who pay you to take out hits on people, but as of yet, we have no way of divining who these are. We would also like to point out that we have not openly declared a Guild-wide war on your dubiously legal organisation, a move we like to think of as somewhat generous."'''

==JB Aristide's Terms of Surrender for the CP==

I grow weary of our war, and is it obvious now that the only time the CP can kill me is when there are [http://wiki.shartak.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&action=history more pressing matters] in the world. Therefore, i offer the following terms of surrender to the CP:

* the CP ceases all action against me.
* the CP gives me a one-time payment of 100 gold.
* the CP agrees that they will never, under any circumstances, participate in any raid of Raktam.

In return, I cease all action against you, and will guarantee that my York spies do not help in any other actions against the CP.

Otherwise, how long will this war continue? How many more unanswered killings will the CP suffer? Let us put an end to it.
--[[User:Frisco|Frisco]] 02:30, 16 July 2006 (UTC) (as JB Aristide)

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "I too would like to see the end of this war. I'm sure we can come to some arrangement. Here are our terms: '''

::* '''the CP will cease all action against JB Aristide and his partners.''' 
::* '''JB Aristide and his partners will cease all action against the CP and all the citizens of York.''' 
::* '''the CP agrees that they will never, under any circumstances, participate in any raid of Raktam.''' 

:::'''If you don't agree to these terms we can try to come to another agreement."'''

== Inaccuracies in offence lists ==

Between my first execution (2006-07-09 23:13) and eight offense (a killing of [[User:MickR|MickR]] at 2006-07-16 18:20), I also killed Kjendlie, was killed by Kjendlie, and killed Kjendlie once again, as [http://www.philosoph.us/misc/shartak/underworld/?id=2445 my Underworld page] shows. I feel somewhat slighted, even though this ommitted information will make the kill to death ratio next to my name less flattering. By the way, might I suggest that times for executions be included <nowiki></nowiki> so they'll correspond to logged deaths?

Oh, and it was nice to hear your voice the other day, MickR. I'm sorry I didn't have time to stick around and chat back. ;)

— [[User:Elembis|Elembis]] ([[User talk:Elembis|talk]]) 05:05, 17 July 2006 (UTC)

:'''[[User:MickR|MickR]][[Colonial Police|CP]] - "Sorry if the list isn't always perfect, we try our best. I've fixed it for now."

I killed {{profile|2435|sayt}} recently (see [http://www.philosoph.us/misc/shartak/underworld/?id=2445 my Underworld page]) and that hasn't been mentioned on your offense list yet. Maybe this notice will help.

Given that my kill of a clan member has escaped notice for several days, and given that attacks on non-CP members account for a mere handful of the offenses on your list (I count eight), it seems like your clan's vindictive goal of executing everyone who's ever killed an outsider (or merely attacked one, in some cases) is well beyond your reach. — [[User:Elembis|Elembis]] ([[User talk:Elembis|talk]]) 06:54, 24 July 2006 (UTC)

joef1day is not the guy who's been tagging "Blame Josef". Why you people insist on crediting a target so obvious is beyond me. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 07:35, 23 September 2006 (UTC)

== Unprovoked attack at SCS HQ ==

Hello, [[User:John Sevier|John Sevier]] here to report being killed without provocation at York, at the [[Shartak Cryptozoological Society]] Headquarters by [[user:eminem1|eminem1]], who claimed I was guilty of something, though did not bother to say what. As I have only killed an outsider once [and then in self-defense], I have no idea what he is referring to do. The proof is in my profile {{profile|4420|John Sevier}}. I have since returned to my HQ and have weakened him, but I would appreciate assistance from the Colonial Police as I will not be able to finish him off this cycle. --[[User:John Sevier|John Sevier]] 14:00, 23 September 2006 (UTC)

Update: eminem1 told me he was attacking me as he thought I might be behind the 'Blame Josef' nonsense (for the record, I am not; in fact I am getting sick of constantly writing over). I let him go with 1 hp despite killing me earlier. I consider the matter resolved. Also, feel free to list the [[Shartak Cryptozoological Society]] as an ally, I appreciated your assistance earlier with my clan's HQ. --[[User:John Sevier|John Sevier]] 01:52, 24 September 2006 (UTC)

... How in the name of The Great Zombie did that water collector come to that most erroneous conclusion? Seriously. I am not John, I am not joef1day. For the love of the Gods, people. At least post your guesses here before you start kicking the crud out of fellow outsiders. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 05:25, 24 September 2006 (UTC)

== No, you idiots! IDIOTS! ==

Eli's not the spammer either. HOW DO YOU COME TO THESE CONCLUSIONS!? HOW HOW HOW HOW!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!? IDIOTS. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 23:33, 30 September 2006 (UTC)

== Arwedda Leaving ==
The other founder and ex-leader of the Colonial Police has decided to leave, due to the general inactivity of both him and many clan members. He wishes those who remain luck and success. --[[User:Arwedda|Arwedda]] 07:36, 2 October 2006 (UTC)

== Best of luck Arwedda ==

Best of luck Arwedda, I have personally never seen the CP so active as of late. Hopefully one day you will return. - Nighter

== And Josef is... ==

Wolf Kazumaru, beaches. He's sleeping at CPHQ, so go toast him.

And yes. I'm absolutely sure you'll just take my word on this, because you're complete morons and have little to no critical thinking skills. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 07:33, 9 October 2006 (UTC)

== Your wanted lists... ==

First, you still list joef1day as a possible me, which he is not. Second, do I, Wolf Kazumaru, at least get a place under Executed? If not, I'm not sure whether I'm able to get back into York without instadeath or not. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 00:03, 17 October 2006 (UTC)

Shame. Looks like someone needs more attention. We forget about you for a while, but you can't live without attention. -[[User:Che|Che]] 01:29, 18 October 2006 (UTC)

No, I'm just rather obsessive and would prefer the wanted list to be correct. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 01:39, 18 October 2006 (UTC)

Talk:Colonial police

2006-10-17T00:03:42Z

Josef: /* And Josef is... */

User:Josef

2006-10-15T08:48:16Z

Josef:

Josef Q&A

Q: Why did you give yourself up?

A: This got boring and pointless after I joined the wiki. My whole mission was to be notable, and I have failed.

Q: Alright, that's fair. So why did you start?

A: Because I find Shartak incredibly boring as is and needed something to do. So I thought, why not Blame Josef?

Q: And who the hell is Josef, anyway?

A: Josef is a generic Russian of my imagination, based off Josef from the game Mercenaries. This whole thing started after I failed a mission and randomly mumbled "Stupid Josef."

Q: Uh, so. I want to kill you. Where are you now?

A: Taking a cue from a man with the name Cheney, I'm residing at The Unspecified Location, somewhere north of York, yet south of Iceland.

Q: YOU SUCK GET OFF THE WIKI! GEERRRRROOOOFFFF!

A: Not a question, and no.

User talk:Black Joe

2006-10-10T21:36:04Z

Josef: /* Sorry, you fail. Try again please. */

== MajesticNinja's Reply ==
Tis funny. I wish to help you as a Derbian, but as an alt... I believe Philip Murry has met Captain Dan a couple of times? (Most noticably at the end of a rifle!) Hes my alt, Majestics my main. As for thanking me, don't think about it. Derbys a quiet place, which is why I love it, but it does get boring. When it gets going, I'll jion. '''MajesticNinja'''

I sort of invented the idea of calling it a Vendetta instead of a raid for that reason. This is really only the formalisation (sp?) of the hostilities that have been a reality since these clans were formed. I think the declaration itself makes it clear that we're targeting these clans exclusively rather than the general population of York. I made it clear that York welcomed civil pirates with open arms (which they have), and that the pirates were only being attacked by these clans. This isn't entirely true (there's always the random clanless fellow with a grudge) but I'd rather lean towards caution and limit the Crew to those who have run up the Anti-Pirate flag, so to speak. In a lot of ways this is overdue in any case. The only reason the Crew's being encouraged to come to York at all is that for, reasons unknown to me, all these clans are based out of there. [[User:Tyler Whitney|Tyler Whitney]] 01:11, 4 October 2006 (UTC)

== Sorry, you fail. Try again please. ==

I have not vandalized the Wiki proper, nor do I plan to do so. I've kept only to the talk pages and my own user page, except for the one occasion when I removed some misinformation from the CP page. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 08:19, 10 October 2006 (UTC)

Eh. After a long night of the dreamless sleep of the damned, I've decided to cut down on my insults, too. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 14:16, 10 October 2006 (UTC)

Glad to hear it. I apologize for calling you a troll. I was rather irked at the time.[[User:Black Joe|Black Joe]]

'sok. I also apologize- I got a bit rude when I decided to come onto the wiki. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 21:36, 10 October 2006 (UTC)

User talk:Black Joe

2006-10-10T14:16:47Z

Josef: /* Sorry, you fail. Try again please. */

User:Josef

2006-10-10T08:22:56Z

Josef:

Josef Q&A

Q: Why did you give yourself up?
A: This got boring and pointless after I joined the wiki. My whole mission was to be notable, and I have failed.

Q: Alright, that's fair. So why did you start?
A: Because I find Shartak incredibly boring as is and needed something to do. So I thought, why not Blame Josef?

Q: And who the hell is Josef, anyway?
A: Josef is a generic Russian of my imagination, based off Josef from the game Mercenaries. This whole thing started after I failed a mission and randomly mumbled "Stupid Josef."

Q: YOU SUCK GET OFF THE WIKI! GEERRRRROOOOFFFF!
A: Not a question, and no.

User talk:Black Joe

2006-10-10T08:19:10Z

Josef: /* MajesticNinja's Reply */

User talk:Josef

2006-10-10T08:17:10Z

Josef: /* You missed a few... */

==You missed a few...==

I like these myself:

*'''154 children raped as of right now! Blame Josef!'''
*'''<Insert "Blame Josef" crap here>'''
*'''Josef: Showing the intelligence of York'''

Oh yes, and if you calling the CP 'corrupt', you have to have proof, eh? For now, you can just put this on your homepage:

[[Colonial Police|The Meanie Police :'(]]

'''How dare they not blame Josef!!!!'''

*Of course they're corrupt. Otherwise I'd have been caught by now. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 07:00, 5 October 2006 (UTC)

wait wait wait.
not catching things makes you corrupt?
dude. ring the dictionary.

they've got it wrong.

Not quite what I meant. If not looking for me, what the hell are they doing? Sitting around and playing with themselves? Hmm? [[User:Josef|Josef]] 07:28, 9 October 2006 (UTC)

You're right. Good insult. They're playing with themselves. Nice. Although, you're vandalizing evrey thing you see. Yeah. They're the real corrupt ones. [[User:Che|Che]] 21:40, 9 October 2006 (UTC)

Not what you meant? Then why'd you say it..? --[[User:Arwedda|Arwedda]] 03:26, 10 October 2006 (UTC)

Not my fault you read it wrong, Arwedda. and Che: Glad to see you finally decided to tag one of your entries. The whole reason I bothered to keep playing the game was to tag Blame Josef on everything. I'd be corrupt if I gave people exclusion to that, wouldn't I? [[User:Josef|Josef]] 08:17, 10 October 2006 (UTC)

Talk:Colonial police

2006-10-09T07:33:11Z

Josef:

User talk:Josef

2006-10-09T07:28:41Z

Josef: /* You missed a few... */

User talk:Josef

2006-10-05T07:00:36Z

Josef: /* You missed a few... */

User talk:Che

2006-10-05T06:46:01Z

Josef:

=='ello==
Please, feel free to add an entry, thanking me, or cursing me, whatever, its up to you. --[[User:Che|Che]] 22:15, 20 August 2006 (UTC)

== The Yorkman ==

We're interested in running a story on the Colonial Police in the second issue of the Yorkman (to be published around 1st sept). if Your would be willing to answer some questions, please [[Special:Emailuser/The_Yorkman|e-mail]] us in the next few days. -- [[User:The Yorkman|The Yorkman]] 14:51, 26 August 2006 (UTC)

== A correction ==

We raided Dalpok not Wiksik (That was the strumpet If you want to be our mortal enemy get your facts right.:)--[[User:Michael edwards|Michael edwards]] 02:37, 16 September 2006 (UTC)

:Bottom line: A native village - [[User:Che|Che]]

Yes but I don't want to take away the Strumpet's credit.--[[User:Michael edwards|Michael edwards]] 02:41, 16 September 2006 (UTC)

== Apology ==

You're 13. Thought you were older. Sorry. I'll stop picking on you. [[FirstAmongstDaves|First Amongst Daves]]

== Blaming Josef ==

Lovely entry in my talk page, gave me quite a laugh. Many thanks, friend. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 06:46, 5 October 2006 (UTC)

User:Josef

2006-10-01T09:23:04Z

Josef: /* Orctober 1st */

Josef absorbs twice the blame as the leading brand! Blame Josef.

Knockoffs: Blame Sid, Blame LeRoy, Lame Josef.

People and groups who don't want to join in the Josef blaming fun: The [[Colonial Police|Corrupt Police]] and [[The Water Collecting Co.|those bloody water collectors.]]

== Journally Thingy!! ==

=== Orctober 1st ===

My followers, we have another enemy on our hands. Some idiot named "Wolf Kazumaru" has declared War on us.

It's only a matter of time before he falls to our might...

BLAME JOSEF.

=== 1:10 AM, Sept 26th ===

Aha, my followers! Today we have acheieved a GREAT VICTORY! [[The Water Collecting Co.|Those bloody water collectors.]] exist no more!

Rejoice, my subjects! The Goals of Josef (TM) shall come to fruition soon!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Er... Ignore the evil laughter.

Blame Josef!

User:Josef

2006-10-01T09:22:18Z

Josef: /* 1:10 AM, Sept 26th */

Josef absorbs twice the blame as the leading brand! Blame Josef.

Knockoffs: Blame Sid, Blame LeRoy, Lame Josef.

People and groups who don't want to join in the Josef blaming fun: The [[Colonial Police|Corrupt Police]] and [[The Water Collecting Co.|those bloody water collectors.]]

== Journally Thingy!! ==

== Orctober 1st ==

My followers, we have another enemy on our hands. Some idiot named "Wolf Kazumaru" has declared War on us.

It's only a matter of time before he falls to our might...

BLAME JOSEF.

=== 1:10 AM, Sept 26th ===

Aha, my followers! Today we have acheieved a GREAT VICTORY! [[The Water Collecting Co.|Those bloody water collectors.]] exist no more!

Rejoice, my subjects! The Goals of Josef (TM) shall come to fruition soon!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Er... Ignore the evil laughter.

Blame Josef!

Colonial police

2006-10-01T09:19:07Z

Josef: /* Most Wanted */

{{Clanbox|
clan_name=Colonial Police|
official_id=16|
open_to=outsiders|
clan_image=[[Image:CPLogo.jpg]]|
clan_leaders=Kjendlie.|
clan_membership=10+|
clan_goals=Keeping the peace.|
clan_recruit=Simply talk to us at the CPHQ or place your profile under the "List of Members" on this page.|
clan_contact=Arwedda and Kjendlie, in York ([http://www.itechsc.com/misc/shartak/ubermap/closeup.php?sk=1&sc=1&cx=-70374&cy=26313 -70.374,+26.313]) or you can talk to us on our [http://z7.invisionfree.com/Colonial_Police/index.php? forum]|
sort_as=|
}}

[http://www.shartak.com/clanview.cgi?id=16 The Colonial Police] are a group of outsiders devoted to keeping the peace, and punishing those who would take other's lives. Our primary mission is the execution of any person who has killed outsiders on the island. We are currently not offering any protection to the natives.

We are always looking for new members. As long as you know what we're about, you can join.
Just place your name and profile under the 'List of Members' below. If you join, stop by our headquarters at [http://www.itechsc.com/misc/shartak/ubermap/closeup.php?sk=1&sc=1&cx=-70374&cy=26313 -70.374,+26.313].
Talk to us on our [http://z7.invisionfree.com/Colonial_Police/index.php? forum].

Citizens! Report any murders to the officer(s) on duty in the Colonial Police Headquarters, at the following location: [http://www.itechsc.com/misc/shartak/ubermap/closeup.php?sk=1&sc=1&cx=-70374&cy=26313 -70.374,+26.313].

If no-one on the list below is present, you can also talk to us on our [http://z7.invisionfree.com/Colonial_Police/index.php? forum].

== List of Members ==

=== Leaders ===
* {{profile|2470|Kjendlie}}

=== Members ===
* {{profile|1588|Arwedda}}
* {{profile|1603|czech1}}
* {{profile|3105|Nighter}}
* {{profile|3322|Zydd Soral}}
* {{profile|2435|sayt}}
* {{profile|3428|Sora Lamal}}
* {{profile|5731|Cisisero}}
* {{profile|3258|Vizerdrix}}
* {{profile|3225|leathel99764}}
* {{profile|3321|radiohead1102}}
* {{profile|1098|Admiral Nelson}}
* {{profile|3586|Ukapu Boy}}
* {{profile|4126|corperal}}
* {{profile|3915|Bubba}}
* {{profile|4231|Colonel Curtis}}
* {{profile|3999|TalynDerre}}
* {{profile|4705|Liktai}}

== Alliances and Friends ==

* [[The South Shartak Trading Company]]
* [[S.P.I.R.I.T.S]]
* [[Shartak Cryptozoological Society]]
* [[Royal Expedition]]
* [[The Water Collecting Co.]] and {{profile|3819|eminem1}}
* [[Shartak Rebel Forces]]
* Prominent York citizen and the keeper of the York Chronicles, {{profile|2706|'''guest'''}}

== List of Criminals ==

=== Most Wanted ===
(kill on sight)

*{{profile|3059|Eli Jenkins}} (Outsider) is wanted for the murder of an officer. '''-Executed!''' '''-Second Offence''' Attacked two officers in the CPHQ. '''-Executed again.''' '''-Third Offence''' Attacked two more officers inside the CPHQ. '''-Executed''' '''-Fourth Offence''' Killed another officer. '''-Fifth Offence''' Attacked two officers inside the CPHQ. '''-Executed!''' '''-Sixth Offence''' Attacked another officer inside the CPHQ! '''-Executed again''' '''-Seventh Offence''' Attacked an officer repeatedly. '''-Eighth Offence''' Killed an innocent civilian. '''EXECUTED!''' '''-Ninth Offence''' Attacked another officer. '''Executed again''' '''-Tenth Offence''' Attacked two officers inside the CPHQ. '''-EXECUTED!''' '''-Eleventh Offence''' Attacked an officer inside the CPHQ. '''-EXECUTED!''' '''-Twelfth Offence''' Killed an officer.'''-EXECUTED!''' '''-Thirteenth Offence''' Killed an officer. '''-Fourteenth Offence''' Attacked numerous officers.''' -EXECUTED!''' '''-Fourteenth Offence''' Attacked an officer. '''EXECUTED! -Executed Again. -Executed Again.''' '''ATTENTION:''' Eli Jenkins is NOT the one that has been spamming Blame Josef, you bloody idiots.

=== At Large ===
*{{profile|2141|Raffles}} (Pirate), an aggressive York-hating pirate, is wanted for numerous attacks on York citizens and for the murders of several innocent civilian. '''-Second Offence''' Killed an officer. '''-EXECUTED!''' '''-Third Offense''' Killed an officer in the CPHQ.'''-fourth Offense''' Killed an officer in the CPHQ.

*{{profile|1327|Tom Failur}} (Outsider), a mercenary and so notorious around here that he has been dubbed "The Butcher of York", is wanted for a new string of unprovoked attacks on innocent civilians in and around the Medical Supplies hut.

*{{profile|3550|Baron Samedi}} (Native) is wanted for nurmous attacks on civilians. Has killed five people in one week! '''High Priority'''

*{{profile|2176|Cunstnail}} (Native) is wanted for the murder of an officer.

*{{profile|318|Snake Tongue}} (Native) is wanted for the murder of an officer!

*{{profile|582|Barbecue}} (Native) is wanted for murdering an officer!

*{{profile|772|Dave C}} (Native) and {{profile|754|Xiombarg}}(Native) are wanted for repeatedly attacking an officer.

*{{profile|1522|Barbarossa}} (Pirate) is wanted by the Colonial Police for the murder of an officer.

*{{profile|1677|Paul Gascoigne}} (Native) is wanted for the murder of an officer

*{{profile|1553|Stoertebecker}} (Pirate) is wanted for the murder of an officer within the CPHQ. '''-Connected to Lord Paul Reefer!''' '''-Second offence!''' Repeatedly attacked another officer. '''-Third offence!''' Killed an innocent civilian. '''-Executed''' '''-Fourth offence!''' Murdered two officers inside the CPHQ. '''-Executed again''' '''-Fifth offence!''' Killed another officer! '''-Executed!''' '''-Sixth offence!''' Attacked an officer multiple times in the CPHQ, almost killing him. '''-Seventh offence!''' Attacked another officer. '''-Eighth offence!''' Killed a CP officer.

*{{profile|750|Halfway there}} (Outsider-Durham) is wanted for killing an officer in the CPHQ and wanted for questioning in numerous attacks on civilians.'''-Executed!''' '''-Second offence!''' Attacked members of the Colonial Police in the CPHQ. Also wanted for questioning on the Durham-York conflict.

*{{profile|1608|Anne Bonney}} (Pirate) is wanted for attacking Colonial Police members in the CPHQ.

*{{profile|4128|Kadaj}} (Outsider) is wanted for killing a Colonial Police officer.

*{{profile|4924|screech}} {Ousider) is wanted for killing at least 2 York citizens.-'''Executed!'''

*{{profile|304|joef1day}} (Outsider) is wanted for killing a citizen inside the tavern, and killing a member of the CP more than 5 times, also has a suspected alias - "blame josef", defacing every hut he sees. At least seven offences '''-Executed'''-Eighth offence!''' Killed a CP officer. '''Admission of guilt on the discussion page. -Arwedda'''

=== Suspected ===
*All members and suspected members of the [[Mercenary's Guild]], for conspiracy to murder York citizens and conspiracy to foment and create civil disorder in York.

*An individual named Isaac has been reportedly attacking civilians in York. Anyone with information on this person, please contact us in the [http://www.itechsc.com/misc/shartak/ubermap/closeup.php?sk=1&sc=1&cx=-70374&cy=26313 CPHQ].

=== Executed ===
*{{profile|3179|Agent47}} (Outsider), mercenary, is wanted for questioning on the possibility of contracted hits on CP Officers and for the murder of a Colonial Police officer.'''-Executed!'''

*{{profile|3576|manteno}} (Outsider) is warned against Assaulting Police officers - '''-Second offence!''' Killed a man in the Trader hut '''-Executed!'''

*{{profile|712|Qberry}} (Native) is wanted for the murder of an officer. '''-Executed!'''

*{{profile|2445|Elembis}} (Native) is wanted for the murder of a Colonial Police officer inside the CPHQ. '''-Second Offence''' Killed another officer! '''-Third Offence''' Murdered numerous civilians. '''-Forth Offence''' Attacked an officer inside the CPHQ! '''-Fifth Offence''' Killed another officer inside the CPHQ. '''-Sixth Offence''' Murdered another officer. '''-Seventh Offence''' Murdered numerous civilians. '''-Executed!''' '''-Eighth Offence''' Murdered another officer inside the CPHQ. '''-Ninth Offence''' Attackted and poisoned and officer inside the CPHQ '''-Executed!''' '''-Tenth Offence''' Killed another officer inside the CPHQ. '''-Executed!''' (Note: This individual seems to have reformed, and is no longer considered a criminal. He remains on the list only for reference.)

* A warning to {{profile|539|Schmeckel}} (Outsider) for repeatedly attacking an officer. '''-Brought to justice.''''''

*{{profile|2825|Lucifer Rustypants}} (Pirate) is wanted for repeatedly attacking an officer. '''-Executed.'''

*{{profile|1571|Arrgyle}} (Pirate) is wanted for the murder of an officer inside the CPHQ! '''-Executed'''

*{{profile|2659|Dashing Derek}} (Outsider) is wanted for murdering a CP officer. (HIRED) '''-Brought to justice.''''''

*{{profile|2418|Firebabe871}} (Outsider) is wanted for repeatedly attacking a CP officer. '''-Executed'''

*{{profile|2091|zybe}} (Native) is wanted by the Colonial Police for repeatedly attacking an officer inside the Colonial Police HQ. '''-Executed'''

*{{profile|1879|Phutnanog}} (Native) wanted for multiple murders of officers and civilians. '''-Executed''' '''-Second Offence''' Attacked another officer. '''-Brought to justice'''

*{{profile|1828|Mal}} (Native) is wanted for the murder of a citizen. '''-Executed!'''

*{{profile|2364|Dekuyper}} (Pirate) is wanted for killing innocent civilians. '''-Brought to justice''''''

*{{profile|4499|Sylth}} is wanted for the murder of a citizen. '''-Executed!'''

*{{profile|3239|Jacob Ladder}} (Outsider) is wanted for an attack on an officer. '''-Executed!''' '''-Second Offence''' Attacked an officer in the CPHQ'''-Executed!'''

*{{profile|1629|Lord Paul Reefer}} (Outsider) is wanted for murdering an officer. '''-Connected to Stoertebecker!''' '''-Second Offence''' Killed another officer! '''-Third Offence''' Attacked an officer repeatedly within the CPHQ. '''-Fourth Offence''' Murdered an officer in the CPHQ! '''-Fifth Offence''' Murdered another officer! '''-Sixth Offence''' Killed an officer in the CPHQ! '''-Seventh Offence''' Repeatedly attacked an officer inside the CPHQ! '''-Eighth Offence''' Murdered another officer in the CPHQ! '''-EXECUTED!''' '''-Ninth offence''' Repeatedly attacked an officer within the CPHQ. '''-Tenth Offence''' Conspiracy to commit murder. '''-Eleventh Offence''' Killed an officer in the CPHQ. '''-Executed!''' '''-Twelth Offence!''' Murdered two more officers in the shallow waters of York. '''-Executed!''' '''-Thirteenth Offence''' Talking to him obviously didn't work, as he's now killed two more officers in the CPHQ! '''-Fourteenth Offence''' Murdered another officer! '''-Executed!''' '''-Fifteenth Offence''' Killed an officer inside the CPHQ. '''-Executed again''' '''-Sixteenth Offence''' Attacked an officer inside the CPHQ. '''-Executed again''' '''-Seventeenth Offence''' Attacked an officer inside the CPHQ. '''-Executed!''' '''-Eighteenth Offence''' Killed an officer inside the CPHQ. '''-EXECUTED!''' '''-Ninteenth Offence''' Murdered an officer inside the CPHQ! '''-Twentieth Offence''' Killed a CP officer inside the CPHQ. '''-EXECUTED!''''''-Twenty-first offence''' Killed an Officer of the Colonial Police'''-EXECUTED!'''

*{{profile|1492|JB Aristide}} (Native) is wanted by the Colonial Police for murdering an officer. '''-Second offence!''' Attacked an officer. '''-Third offence!''' Murdered another officer! '''-Fourth offence!''' Murdered an innocent civilian. '''-Fifth offence!''' Attacked another officer! '''-Sixth offence!''' Repeatedly attacked an officer! '''-Executed!''' '''-Seventh offence!''' Killed an officer. '''-Eighth offence!''' Murdered another officer! '''-Ninth offence!''' Killed another CP officer! '''-Tenth offence!''' Killed another officer. '''-Eleventh offence!''' Murdered a CP officer. '''-Twelth offence!''' Killed an officer inside the CPHQ. '''-Thirteenth offence!''' Murdered another officer. '''-Fourteenth offence!''' Poisoned and otherwise injured an officer. '''-Fifteenth offence!''' Killed an officer! '''-Sixteenth offence!''' Murdered another officer inside the CPHQ! '''-Seventeenth offence!''' Murdered another CP officer! '''-Eighteenth offence!''' Killed another Colonial Police officer.'''-nineteenth offence!''' murdered another Colonial Police officer. '''-Twentieth offence!''' Killed an officer and attacked another officer inside the CPHQ. '''-EXECUTED and fled York in shame!'''

== News ==
===Septermber 28th, 2006===
Alarming numbers of [[Mercenary's Guild|mercenaries]] have descended upon York and reports of murders of innocent civilians by mercenaries are pouring into the CPHQ. Also, the feared attacks by the [[The Jolly Roger Gang|Jolly Roger Clowns]] failed to materialize, apparently as a result of their attack force getting lost, which suggests that the group is full of blustery incompetents and boorish drunks, as suspected all along.

=== September 20th, 2006 ===

Word is spreading in York of an imminent attack by [[The Jolly Roger Gang]]. York citizens are advised to travel with caution when on the north-bound road out of York.
Also, our alliance with the [[Order of Patriots]] has officially come to an end.

=== September 9th, 2006 ===

The conflict between Durham and York continues to escalate, as a Durhamer has begun to attack Colonial Police members while shouting messages like "The island for Durham!!!". In the latest incident, Durhamer {{profile|750|Halfway there}} and pirate associate {{profile|1608|Anne Bonney}} jointly attacked Colonial Police members in the CPHQ

=== August 26th, 2006 ===

New leader decided. Kjendlie will be the one to lead the new Colonial Police.

=== August 23rd, 2006 ===

Today, MickR, founder and leader of the Colonial Police retired. A new leader is currently being decided. However, all roads seem to be pointing to Kjendlie as the new leader. This is the new dawn of The Colonial Police!

=== July 7th, 2006 ===

Lately there have been a number of individuals messing with the Colonial Police wiki page. We would like to ask that this page only be edited by official CP members (unless, of course, you are placing your profile under the 'Members' section).

=== July 4th, 2006 ===

The CP is currently undergoing negotiations with the Order of Patriots.

=== July 1st, 2006 ===

The CP has a large number of friends and a large number of enemies. We are currently looking to form alliances with any group that supports our cause...

=== June 15th, 2006 ===

The war with Lord Paul Reefer's group, 'The Reefer Terror Cell', has officially begun. The CP needs new members now more than ever.

=== June 12th, 2006 ===

The Colonial Police now has a grand total of nine members!

=== June 6th, 2006 ===

We found and executed a number of criminals today, and tried talking to Lord Paul Reefer again.

=== June 4th, 2006 ===

Yesterday, a member of the Mercenary's Guild was hired to kill MickR. The negotiations begin...

=== June 2nd, 2006 ===

The CP are looking into entering negotiations with the Mercenary's Guild.

=== May 31st, 2006 ===

The Colonial Police [http://z7.invisionfree.com/Colonial_Police/index.php? forum] is now open.

=== May 28th, 2006 ===

To whoever posted their profile up on the wiki, the link didn't work so I deleted it, please try again.

=== May 27th, 2006 ===

The Colonial Police are now an officially recognised clan. MickR and Arwedda are currently returning to HQ.

=== May 23rd, 2006 ===

Neither Arwedda or MickR have enough XP to set up the clan today, but we're hoping to A.S.A.P. We're going hunting for a short time so that we can get 'Clan Leadership' we shall return to York soon.

=== May 22nd, 2006 ===

After a long and painful trip we finally got him, JB Aristide is down! For the first time in the history of the Colonial Police, the 'Most Wanted' list is empty.

=== May 21st, 2006 ===

We finally found him! Lord Paul Reefer has been brought to justice. His last know location was at [-70.383,+26.304].

=== May 14th, 2006 ===

'''Membership Drive.''' Currently accepting any and every application to join the CPHQ, except those made by convicts. This drive is in response to the rampant crime that has overtaken the peoples of York. Your town needs '''you''' to help keep the peace.

=== May 12th, 2006 ===

There has been some debate as to whether or not W B Hazen was guilty for killing BlackJack inside the CPHQ. Arwedda acted by instinct. W B Hazen... if, in fact, you were not guilty, the Colonial Police apologise for any inconvenience they may have caused.

===May 11th, 2006===

After further investigation by Mick, it seems that natives belonging to a dangerous group called The [[Raktamites]] are camping out in various huts around York. If you have the time, check any huts near-by and make sure there are no dangerous natives inside. Do not attack them unless you are SURE they are PKers.

===May 9th, 2006===

Phutnanog was finally brought to justice today. Hopefully he has now learnt that murders in York will always be avenged.

===May 7th, 2006===

The crime-rate in York is currently at an all time high. The CP is doing all they can to stop the murders.

===May 3rd, 2006===

Two new members joined the Colonial Police today.
Welcome to Slavik and {{profile|1603|czech1}}. Together we can help protect the citizens of York, and eventually reduce crime in York on a massive scale.

===April 29th, 2006===

It seems that a clan of Natives lead by Phutnanog, known as the '[[Raktamites]]' has been on a killing spree in York.
If you have any information that would give us a lead towards the capture of Phutnanog and the other murderous members of his group please contact Mick or Arwedda at the Colonial Police HQ in York (-70.374,+26.313).

===April 25th, 2006===

Clan established.

Talk:Colonial police

2006-09-30T23:33:07Z

Josef:

User:Josef

2006-09-26T06:11:18Z

Josef: /* 1:10 AM, Sept 26th */

Josef absorbs twice the blame as the leading brand! Blame Josef.

Knockoffs: Blame Sid, Blame LeRoy, Lame Josef.

People and groups who don't want to join in the Josef blaming fun: The [[Colonial Police|Corrupt Police]] and [[The Water Collecting Co.|those bloody water collectors.]]

== Journally Thingy!! ==

=== 1:10 AM, Sept 26th ===

Aha, my followers! Today we have acheieved a GREAT VICTORY! [[The Water Collecting Co.|Those bloody water collectors.]] exist no more!

Rejoice, my subjects! The Goals of Josef (TM) shall come to fruition soon!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Er... Ignore the evil laughter.

Blame Josef!

User:Josef

2006-09-26T06:10:31Z

Josef:

Josef absorbs twice the blame as the leading brand! Blame Josef.

Knockoffs: Blame Sid, Blame LeRoy, Lame Josef.

People and groups who don't want to join in the Josef blaming fun: The [[Colonial Police|Corrupt Police]] and [[The Water Collecting Co.|those bloody water collectors.]]

== Journally Thingy!! ==

= 1:10 AM, Sept 26th =

Aha, my followers! Today we have acheieved a GREAT VICTORY! [[The Water Collecting Co.|Those bloody water collectors.]] exist no more!

Rejoice, my subjects! The Goals of Josef (TM) shall come to fruition soon!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

*Ahem* er. Ignore the evil laughter.

Blame Josef!

User talk:John Sevier

2006-09-24T08:33:43Z

Josef:

==Hello==

Please send any messages for me personally here; for inquiries/comments about the [[Shartak Cryptozoological Society]] please post at the [[Talk:Shartak Cryptozoological Society|Talk page]]

== Misspelled SCS page ==

''Original message: [[User talk:Elembis#Thanks]]
:No problem. You had blanked the page, but it still existed (as a blank page), since only moderators can actually delete pages. — [[User:Elembis|Elembis]] ([[User talk:Elembis|talk]]) 19:36, 3 August 2006 (UTC)

== The Yorkman ==

We're interested in running a story on the Three-Headed Monkey, and any other rare and fantastic beasts you have encountered, in the second issue of the Yorkman (to be published around 1st sept). If you would be willing to answer some questions, or possibly write a bi-weekly column, please [[Special:Emailuser/The_Yorkman|e-mail]] us in the next few days. -- [[User:The Yorkman|The Yorkman]] 14:59, 26 August 2006 (UTC)

== Tell you what... ==

Just because I'm a nice guy, I'll stop putting graffiti on your headquarters. And on the off chance one of the [[Colonial Police|Corrupt Police]] members reads this, you're not getting a similar deal. Same with you godforsaken Water Collectors. [[User:Josef|Josef]] 08:33, 24 September 2006 (UTC)

Talk:Colonial police

2006-09-24T05:25:46Z

Josef: /* Unprovoked attack at SCS HQ */

User:Josef

2006-09-23T08:09:41Z

Josef:

Talk:Colonial police

2006-09-23T07:35:47Z

Josef: /* Inaccuracies in offence lists */

Talk:Colonial police

2006-09-23T07:35:23Z

Josef: /* Inaccuracies in offence lists */