1st Imperial Privateers Regiment
|1st Imperial Privateers Regiment|
|Leadership:||First Amongst Daves|
|Members:||17, as at November 2006|
|Goals:||DISPATCHED by Her Beautific Majesty Queen Laura I of Holland with Letters of Marque and Reprisal to Disrupt all Her Majesty's Enemies' trade, shipping and commerce in the Spanish Main and Particularly Shartak Island, the Imperials invite and welcome all new recruits, whether they be Gentlemen Volunteers, Seaman, Able-bodied Landsmen, Foreigners or Indigeous Natives, and wish to acquire Riches and honour as corsair marines, provided they show Proper Allegiance to the Crown and will be met with all due Encouragement, and the best Treatment. Current operations of the Imperials include: Firstly, the Establishment of a Mercantile Bank: Secondly, ship-building at the Western Dockyards of Rodrigo island north of Durham [GPS: -70.649; +26.391] where the Hull of the 180 tonne full-rigged Man-O-War Grand Admiral Neilencio is to be Laid: Thirdly, assisting the Jolly Roger Gang, the Colonial Police, the Durham Pistoleers and the Derby Hospitallers in their Pogrom against Rogue Wiksik Headhunters invading Durham. Report at Regimental Headquarters. GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!|
|Contact:||Ingame with Colonel First, Colonel Bellamy, or at Regimental HQ(http://www.xsorbit1.com/users/incandescent/index.cgi?board=A). Upon accepting a brevet to the Letters of Marque and Reprisal, sign your name under "Regimental Roll Call"|
GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!!!| Our Royal Highness Queen Laura I of Holland, who has commissioned this regiment, has been beseeched to hand out medals to the lads of the Imperials. (Lazy cow is on holidays in the Antipodes.)
Our 1st Imperial Bank is now open for business in York, Raktam, Derby and Durham, each branch within one square of the traders' huts. Deposits have been doing a roaring trade, with only one loan to date. A third dividend to investors will be announced shortly.
And, HUZZAH! to Kristofer Schanz for claiming Derby Island, now New Maastricht, for the Crown. Ensign Schanz shall carry the regimental colours for the duration in honour of his exploits. - FirstAmongstDaves 18 November 2006.
And, HUZZAH! for the successful conquer by the Imperials of the village formerly known as Dalpok, now New Amsterdam. Medals for everyone. Top marks to Colonel Trust for 7 dead, and Colonel Chen for 5 dead. Thanks to all combatants for 30 dead in total, the indigeneous leaders in disarray and trapped in the medical hut. A victory march through the main avenue is being planned. NCOs: please make a few tonnes of confetti. FirstAmongstDaves 27 December 2006.
And HUZZAH to me, Timothy Trust and Sam Bellamy for our promotion to Major-General. FirstAmongstDaves 8 January 2007.
Regimental Roll Call
- First Amongst Daves - A Major-General of the Regiment. Loves a strong cup of Russian Caravan tea, playing silly mid-on, and wearing no pants into combat as a sign of bravery.
- Sam Bellamy - A Major-General of the Regiment. Epee scars from Heidelburg. Fine bone china tea set from a tour of duty in Asmara. Wicketkeeper.
- Timothy Trust - A Major-General of the Regiment. Dabbler of buxom womenfolk from the Orient. Manly chest, covered in hair like a bear's pelt. Plays at gully.
- Prometheus - A Colonel of the Regiment. Fond of marmalade on toast, hot baths, and slaughtering native uprisings with sabre drawn. Grown a goatee to assist in foreplay. Plays at first slips.
- Captain Sammitch - A Captain of the Regiment. A bully at Eton, Sammitch will beat his captive foes to death with his bare fists, between eating canapes and hors d'oeurves. Plays at deep fine leg.
- Squeegeeman - A Sergeant-Major of the Regiment. Will not urinate in the jungle. Plays at extra cover.
- Dagwood Foreman - A Sergeant-Major of the Regiment. Carries the regimental gramophone. Plays at third man.
- Nowherehowdy - A Colonel of the Regiment. Like the French, fights with his feet, and makes love with his face. Plays at leg gully.
- Rotten Balls - Corporal and aide-de-camp to Colonel Nowherehowdy. Often drunk in taverns in York. Plays at deep square leg.
- David Hasselhoff - Colonel Nowherehowdy's private. Holds Nowherehowdy's cutlass, and polishes his boots ship-shape and Bristol-fashion. Plays at leg slip. Currently AWOL, fighting natives in New Amsterdam.
- Ella Chen A Colonel of the Regiment. Guerilla fighting hell-raiser from Mindanao. Likes Japanese girls. Thought he was on his way to Kobe when he arrived in Shartak. Very unhappy man. Refuses to play.
- Pariah Lieutenant, from the former Spanish colony of Los Angeles. Dresses like a woman, can kill an opponent at 20 feet with withering stare. Can't stand cricket.
- Piggie A Colonel of the Regiment, armed with his combustible cog-driven Omni Machete Wound Manufactory (Patent Pending). Medium fast bowler.
- John Crichton A Private of the Regiment, aide-de-camp to Colonel Piggie. Sports world's longest horizontal moustache. Plays at second slips.
- Master Lucky, a Colonel of the Regiment. We don't know much about him yet but think he will make a good fast bowler.
- Otacon, a Colonel of the Regiment. Likes causing trouble in York, God Bless Him.
Vale: Major Vlad the Inhaler violently killed by Jonathon T. Bench. Bench caught Major Inhaler polishing his helmet on the outskirts of Durham, and cowardly butchered him with a machete. Major Inhaler's body was never recovered, although we have found his pants. "May his cutlass ever be erect." Rest in Peace.
Resigned: Ibn al Xuffasch,Kristofer Schanz, Dappled Shadow, Hideo Inakajimita, all to further the commercial interests of the independent 1st Imperial Bank of shartal. We wish them well in their money counting.
Professor Henry Quantos, former regimental doctor, has resigned his commission to build roads. Silly man.
Blue Hummingbird, a Native scout and former ensign of the Regiment, has resigned and joined the Scavengers. Kill on sight for treason, then arrest her corpse for trial.
Lama is very naughty and has also joined up. Guess he'll be joining us in sacking Wiksik then!
In June 2007 as a consequence of attrition from the invasion of York the 1st Imperial Privateers Regiment was disbanded. All former members are encouraged to join the Brotherhood of the Coast.